Will Sage Astor-Meltdown May Is Around the Corner — Here’s What To Buy To Avoid Yours

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Are you familiar with Meltdown May? If not, you're about to be. And also, congrats, because you live enough of your life in the real world (and not online) to have not bumped up against such a nuisance. The shortest way to describe it is that somehow, for years now, the entire month of May has signaled a time when people kind of unravel on the internet. And not just on the internet, either.

Maybe they say accidentally inappropriate things, double down on it, triple down, and then act like it's your problem for getting upset. Maybe they've been holding it together for so long, but sunlight being the best disinfectant and all, this is the time that all hell breaks loose.

In a way, it makes sense. May is when we start to leave our houses again with regularity; we start going on more dates, planning for more trips, and just generally existing in full. It's only natural to be a little discombobulated.

But here's the thing: I'm not going to let that happen to you. Or me. Or any of us. We're all going to be so calm, so cool, so collected, and beyond logged out. When we see headlines that bug us, we'll do something about it, not just ramble. We'll take deep breaths. There simply will be no Meltdown May.

Or, at least, if there is....we won't be the ones to kick it off.

Feeling stuck in place? Perhaps like you might go a little stir-crazy if you don't get outta town one of these days? This wallet designed to hold a phone and passport and one is your sign to make it happen.

Increasing temperatures and squeezing back into last year's revealing fashions can have us all a little hot under the collar. This super-soft hoodie is just what you need to snuggle into and relax for a change.

Speaking of relaxing, these soothing bath salts make an obligation (getting clean) much more appealing. Being mad online can wait.

It's really easy to look at your takeout bill and flip out. Flip that on its head by grabbing yourself a new (but petite!) pan from Our Place, which makes it easy to cook, clean, and serve meals from home.

While you're cooking, or maybe just trying to enforce a meditative moment, light this Jill & Ally candle to promote good vibes. Better still? Once you've burned it to completion, you can keep the real crystals inside the wax for continued use.

Not everyone can curb the urge to meltdown with a full-on spa weekend, but the least you can do is give yourself the gift of refreshed and nourished legs.

Maybe something as (deceptively) simple as a puzzle will be enough to keep you focused on something other than being mad on the internet. Bonus points for putting your phone on do not disturb while you do it.

Hey, maybe you don't need to externalize your seasonal anxieties; maybe recording them for yourself in a whimsical journal like this can takes some of the weight off. It's also a way to, if you need to, scribble down the stuff you might like to publish...but know you never will.

The first sunburn of the year is always an immensely unpleasant surprise. Who knows how it might cause you to act out? Strike that possibility altogether by protecting yourself with this SPF from Venus Williams.

When all else fails: Just tell people to stay away from you for the moment. Sometimes, the easiest solution is the best one.

I took the advice of an esthetician and added this to my routine, and I've noticed a marked difference in moisture and plumpness. Again, I'm only speaking from personal experience here. But if you're looking for something to obsess over that isn't the latest headline that's making you crazy, a new skincare product is a wholesome choice.

Hey, sometimes all it takes to set us back on the right path is a good night's sleep. That's why Slip formulated this roll-on scent; in the brand's words, "[the] combination of essential oils, including bergamot and lavender, provide a calming aroma that helps you drift off easily."

It's possible that just the act of treating yourself to a lightweight, spa-like, waffle-knit robe will bring easy-breeziness to your May instead of, like, whatever the equivalent of April showers in the brain is.

These are more than just ultra-trendy, but I'll let Kiramoon describe the Moon Globes in the brand's own words: "Your solution for puffy, inflamed, or tired skin. Moon Globes are freezable facial rollers that recharge tired eyes and skin by de-puffing, calming redness and soothing acne." They also "create a natural glow."

Another personal fave of mine, Bearaby's weighted blankets are soft, breathable, and effective. When I use mine, it provides a physically and mentally calming effect, and it often deters me from obsessing over whatever small thing has disproportionately bugged me. This travel size can be put in the accompanying duffle, so you can enjoy a moment of peace on the go.

I don't know. Maybe there is something to that whole "exercise has a positive effect on the body and mind" concept after all? This ergonomic bar from Bala is "designed to help strength training," so may as well give it a shot!

When it doubt, go Crystal Mode. You may not know if it helps, but it certainly can't hurt.

BTW, Mother's Day isn't too far away. There's still plenty of time left to shop these Mother's Day gifts for wine moms.

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